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Excuses Excuses Excuses…

May 19, 2013 · Cassie

I’ve been working on writing my 1st novel and with all my good intentions it hasn’t been so easy. There is the pressure that everyone knows I am writing that 1st book which in part was to motivate me along; however, some days I am one to rebel as other life issues pop up. You know the excuse that you must cook, clean, do laundry and work that day job. It’s tough to find time to write when your not a full time author. None the less this is how some of my days go…

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So if the blog is a little slow with only 1 or maybe 2 posts a month, know that I am either making up some grandiose excuse or actually putting my words to the page to finish this story that has been in my head for 5 years. I am sure many of you don’t have this issue!

You’re a well oiled machine that is working on your story without any interruption each and every day. You don’t run into issues of self doubt or the occasional road block of not moving your story forward, because you have an outline that shows you how to navigate to the end. Actually you may not have all the answers, but that is okay because your brilliance is self satisfying and the menial tasks are the dry run to your red carpet walk. The vision is so strong that you bask in the light, knowing soon you’ll be wearing sunglasses just to be comfortable.

Does the above describe you? Just know that if it does – I hate you. I envy you. I need you to tell me how.

How do you keep going and rock the above? Is it just experience and time that has made you so wonderful? Is it just that fantastic support system you have?

Comment and share for those of us that are not there yet. Let’s start the discussion and the psycho analysis :)

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Courage Damn It!

April 20, 2013 · Cassie

Have you ever started a project with great excitement and passion only to go head first into the activities to pull back and debate whether or not you’re truly ready for it? That inner voice giving you doubt that you may not have the right skill set to pull it off?  If so then this blog post is for you!

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I’ve been there, done that and got the tee-shirt.  I have this experience in my professional life as well as my personal life as a writer.  It was recently, where I was giving advice to someone about accepting that they weren’t perfect (I mean who is) but the goal is to do it and give it a shot with something your passionate about.  Additionally, how do you ever gain experience if your not willing to go for it? Inner critic be damned!

Then the Oprah ‘a-ha’ moment hit me like a mack truck.  I had halted my activities on my novel (a fantastic idea) all because I thought I needed more time and experience as a writer, that I wouldn’t do the story justice.  I even made a strategic plan in order to get me at a level with experience, that I thought I needed just to come back to the one, I really wanted to do.  Oh the webs we weave in avoidance!  It wasn’t an awful plan, I do have more experience now in my writing, but the big piece of experience with my replaced idea novel was not inspiring nor was it going well – it wasn’t my original idea and passion, it was the rebound novel, like after a bad breakup.  Exciting at first but not completely what you want long term while still emotional from your previous relationship; and a novel is long term and work.

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I needed some inspiration and something to get me on track and by God, to finish my original novel that I am so passionate about. It wasn’t like I didn’t already have efforts there, I had 132 pages and 32,000 word count with a drafted outline – why was it just sitting there. Courage damn it! Yes that good swift kick in the ass, where you question what the heck are you doing – what the hell was I doing?? I decided to pick up Alan Watt’s book, The 90-Day Novel and get to work.  Amazingly, the first chapters are like looking in a mirror regarding all the self doubts I had in the past and why this great unfinished novel is sitting on a shelf.  I am cruising through the process as I can on a daily mission to get my 1st draft truly completed and outta my head, crazy enough I have been thinking on this idea for over 5 years!

I do have set backs from time to time, but I am making the efforts and following a structure which is helpful.  I have been reading what I wrote on my novel, and recalling how critical I was, thinking it was pure crap in the past.  Actually it’s not so bad and it’s moldable and heck draft 1 to draft 3 – 4 usually is quite different.  Maybe I am more relaxed in the process, and now have more confidence, who knows.  I won’t, however, continue to be a hypocrite on telling others to go for it, when I wasn’t truly invested.

QUESTION:

Tell me are you taking the leap and going for it? What keeps you going and how do you silence that inner voice/critic?  Would love to hear your experiences and advice on how you keep trotting along.

Look forward to your comments and the discussion.

Related articles
  • courage is a muscle. build it. (eyesopen99.wordpress.com)
  • Courage and Content (maverickphilosopher.typepad.com)

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Poem: Could you

March 28, 2013 · Cassie

Could You

By Cassie Newell

Could you love somebody like that

Someone who treats you with beautiful lies

Looking into their mis-matched eyes

Face me

Tell me

Break me

Do you judge the attraction of those

With armor that can take the blows

Guns knives the disguise of envy and pride

Make me

Judge me

Wrong me

Would you listen if you didn’t understand

Placing those needs above your own

Words being thrown resolve as hard as stone

Hear me

Touch me

See me

Can you truly find the hope in the lost

Will you choose them at any cost

Honestly

*         *          *          *

Thanks for reading my poem! I hope you enjoyed it.  

All rights for this poem are held by the author. Please contact for permission for reprint or posting outside of this website.

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Story Time – Tips Appreciated

March 19, 2013 · Cassie

I’m sharing a short short story with you.  It was a product of a writing course I took and it’s one of my favorites.  I hope you take the time to enjoy!

Tips Appreciated

By Cassie Newell

Scotty left the subway platform in a hurry bundled tightly to his scarf and his Kenneth Cole long wool coat. Putting his hands in his pockets he felt for his gloves, turning the corner he spotted the old bag lady from yesterday, sitting on the concrete against the financial building.

She was wrapped in several layers of clothes that were torn and dirty. There was a ratted top hat in front of her with a sign written in red Advice from Ol’ Jiffy, Tips Appreciated.

Scotty observed the various suits walking briskly past her. He paused when his cell phone buzzed in his pocket, looking at it, his teenage daughter’s smiling face greeted him on the screen. “Good morning sweetheart.”

“Morning Dad. Just reminding you, that I have an orthodontist appointment at two and need you to pick me up from school and take me.”

“Can Mom take you today, I have a couple of afternoon appointments – .”

“Dad, really? She is still off on the island with what’s his name. They don’t come back until next week, and honestly I don’t think she’ll even remember me and dog breath for her new life.”

“Don’t talk about your brother that way.”

The bag lady smiled at Scotty and patted the spot next to her beckoning him to sit. Scotty just shook his head to display his intent.

“Let me text you at lunch and I’ll see what I can do.” Scotty walked toward the bag lady. “Hey, make sure Barrett, a.k.a dog breath, brushes his teeth before school today.”

Giggling, “Sure Dad. Love you.”

“Love you.” Scotty put his phone in his leather shoulder bag and found himself in front of the bag lady.

She patted the spot next to her again, “Come have a seat, I have something to tell ya.”

Scotty stopped to be polite. He looked at his Tag Hauer watch and smiled, “Sorry but I have to get to work for an important meeting, I don’t have time.”

“Spare some change?”

Scotty stepped around her avoiding people walking by “Actually, I don’t have time.” Tapping his watch.

The bag lady pulled her knees to squat herself to stand and caused Scotty to pause at the scene “Oh dear, ya lost time like ya done lost your wife. An island breeze would be nice bout now.”

“Excuse Me?”

Now standing and dusty herself off, “Lost you are, Ol’ Jiffy can see.”

Scotty looked each way to see if she was speaking to someone else.

She came up to him, smelling of BO and gym locker. Smiling with yellow teeth and cracked lips, her kind old eyes stared at him.

“I’m truly sorry, but if I don’t get to work I may be sitting next to you begging for money, I gotta go.”

Pointing her mitten hand with an exposed index finger she waved it at him. “I aint begging, I offer a service! A service you need to heed.”

It was like he was back in fourth grade sitting in front of the principal being scolded.

“You will lose your job today, but you’re lost already.”

Scotty didn’t move.

“This job isn’t who you are. It’s a blessing that it leaves you.” She curtsied to him in her dirty rags as if it was a ball gown.

Stumbling in retort “I’m not losing my job, I was assured my position was safe.” Scotty paused, the bag lady shook her head.

He quickly tried to smooth over her obvious disappointment. “I didn’t mean to offend you.”

She began laughing rather loudly at his comment. “Ol’ Jiffy isn’t offended, but she is right.” Putting her hands on her wide hips in a pose. “Ya job is no more. Can take daughter to the appointment today without issue.”

“How did you know about that?”

Shrugging her shoulders “Just know.” She turned, humming an upbeat tune to herself. How does she know?

Scotty followed her back to the building wall, she sat behind her hat out of the cold wind. Scotty rummaged through his bag and pulled out his only cash, two dollars, and put them in her hat. “I hope your wrong about the job, I have kids to raise.” Reluctantly he turned to leave.

“A job and kids, is two different kinds of things. Be better than what you’ve settled for.”

He looked at his watch, he was officially late and wouldn’t make the meeting on time. What did it matter?

There was no rush now, what’s done was done. It was most likely decided weeks ago. His corrupt boss wouldn’t tell him the truth if he wanted to keep him working in the interim, it made sense he’d lie.

“Thank you Jiffy.” Scotty waved and strolled away.

*         *          *

Thanks for reading my short short story! I hope you enjoyed it.  

All rights for story are held by the author. Please contact for permission for reprint or posting outside of this website.

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